Time Flies

When my daughter went off to kindergarten, I was so excited for her. She was definitely ready to meet new friends, learn new things, and expand her horizons. I remember feeling slightly melancholic about the milestone, but being mostly concerned that some other kid would crush her amazing, sensitive little spirit. I was home with a baby at the time, so maybe I took it well because I had a distraction? I felt like I just knew she was ready.

Now my son is off to kindergarten and I spend every day with a lump in my throat, trying not to think about it much. He’s only three, how can he be going to school all day, every day?

He forgets to pee, how will he remember at school?
He doesn’t care if he eats, who will make sure he’s nourished?
He throws temper tantrums, will he be negatively labeled?
He’s allergic to nuts, will he be safe?
Will someone threaten him with his allergens?
Will he cry when I’m not there, the way he did at preschool?
Is it smart to be sending him this year or should we have waited till next year?
He can’t identify all his letters or numbers, is that ok?
He can’t zip up his coat independently, or manage buttons.
He can’t wipe his own poopy bum.

Worry, worry, worry.

I know all the parents of older kids are shaking their heads thinking, “If those are the worst of your concerns, you’ve got nothing to worry about”, but that doesn’t make it any less heart-wrenching in this moment, you know?

I’m going to worry about the kids, and I’m going to think about them all day long, because that’s what I do.

I’m a stay/work-at-home mom who has spent the last seven years of her life managing the lives of my kids and my family. There is constant activity in our house; kids playing, kids needing something, kids bugging me while I work… all that good stuff. And now, come September my house will be silent.

Back to school time isn’t a time to rejoice, for me. I’m really going to miss my little buddies.

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16 thoughts on “Time Flies

  1. I feel you. Even though Q is 5 and a half and has a year under his belt, I constantly wonder if school is where he needs to be right now – and he’s not even full-time!

  2. I feel exactly the same! We have decided to keep Charlie in his daycare this year and I will re-evaluate for next September. He has to take a bus to school when he goes so that adds to my worry about him!

  3. I don’t understand how at three it is even called kindergarten or that it’s all day?There isn’t a kindergarten in Albertat that starts that young. Is it really school or more like pre/play-school? Kindergarten is supposed to be 5 years old, is it not? Sorry for all the questions, it’s foreign to this Albertan. I had enough trepidation sending my son to school when he was 4.5, as his birthday was just before the end-of-January cut-off for the school year, and that was for half days. I am a major proponent of them being home longer (in fact I regretted not waiting till the next school year when he would have been 5.5 to start him) but I know not everyone wants or can do that. I’m also not convinced institutionalized schooling is a good thing at all, after all these years. Lots of reading and experience on that. All said, I hope Mason really enjoys it and that you do OK!

    1. Kindergarten here is a two-year program: junior and senior. As long as the child turns 4 before Dec 31, they can start JK, so Mason will be one of the youngest in his class, yes, but it’s common. I don’t know why they decided to make the program full-time, we loved the all-day, every-other-day program Story went to. We figure we’ll give it a try and see how he integrates… we’re not stuck if it doesn’t go well. We can take him out whenever we wish, or remove him completely and re-enroll next year. But he’s been asking to go, and we feel he’s really ready, so we made the choice to send him.

  4. I know ;( I’m such a worry wart when it comes to all of this ~ I just got more or less comfortable with settling Maya at daycare/preschool this past year and now I have the next year worrying about her transition to Kindergarten – the new teachers, allergies like Mason, new friends, new environment. M’s resistance to change doesn’t make it easy – poor little munchkins ;(

    1. I know, but as long as they turn 4 before Dec 31, they can start JK here. It’s this or be the oldest in the class. Both scenarios obviously have pros and cons, but we’ve decided to give this a try since he’s just SO ready. Or, so we think.

      1. I just saw this now. My apologies! Ben started school a year late, so he didn’t start until he was 6. For him it was the best decision. Perhaps a bit scary, but it is what it is. We don’t have Junior Kindergarten but our niece started in Ottawa at the age of 4 as well in JK.

  5. I will say this – N LOVES school – she was at montessori for the first year and this year starts public school JK. She would be SO bored home with me. And as an only child, she benefits from the interaction with other kids (and other adults)! 🙂

    1. M is definitely ready for school, I know that, too. He loved his preschool and is really ready. But, yeah.

  6. My heart cracked a little reading this ~ both for you and for your babe. May I ask, with respect, why you decided to send your little guy to school this fall?

    1. We chose to send him because he is SO ready for it. He was in a preschool last year and is absolutely ready for kindergarten. It’s a tricky decision, I suppose, having a December baby. He can either be the oldest or the youngest in the class — both with pros and cons.

  7. Now that I have a child, I now am starting to understand these worries. I didn’t know that Kindergarten starts that young in Ontario? Your kidlets are rockstars and I’m sure they will continue to be and beyond! Hugs and strength to you, Miss A.

    1. As long as the child turns 4 before Dec 31 of the year they start school, they can go to JK. So Mason will be one of the youngest, but it’s totally normal. Still, makes me a little sad.

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